For the foreseeable future, my individual posts on the Where’s My Midwife? blog will be a series of slogans, some of which are, and some of which are not original. A few of these would probably not be appropriate for a t-shirt or for a button, but they’re meaningful to me… some even made me chuckle or cry a little bit.
Don’t Hate Me Because I Had a Beautiful Birth
To every woman who ever felt judged or insulted by anything that I said because I love birth, midwives, breastfeeding, access to care, evidence-based science, sexuality, and other issues concerning women and empowerment: I am who I am and I love that I gave birth to my babies vaginally, under the care of midwives, and without medication. I love that I breastfed them until they outgrew the need. It made me feel beautiful, powerful, and amazing. I really felt like I had super powers. I know that I had it in me all the time, but many important women (including my midwives), but especially my mother (who knew?!) helped me to access the power to birth my babies and to feed them myself with my own milk.
I don’t mean any of this as a judgment about you or about the type of birth you had, nor about the reproductive choices that you made before you decided to give birth (or if you decided not to have children), nor about the choices that you made after birth for yourself and/or your baby. I don’t judge you if you were unable to breastfeed. Really, and I doth not protest too much. I want us to nurture each other as women. Let me be absolutely clear though, I want you to have access to as much education and information as possible so that you can make informed decisions about your body and about your baby (ies). I want us to avoid as much as possible the self-recrimination and self hate that often causes us to lash out at those who have made other choices and decisions than those we’ve made.
I would like us to be able to talk about the things that are important to us in an authentic way, with whatever passion, or lack thereof, that we may feel about these topics. The topics I listed in the first paragraph are all important to me and I want to speak and write about them. If this is difficult for you to read about, don’t read my entries, or tell me, this is hard for me to read. I will still love you. I will talk to you. I will listen very attentively to what you have to say.
I revel in my experience, and in how I felt about it afterwards. I felt (feel) powerful, beautiful, and amazing. That’s about me, not you.